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Home for the holidays

Anne Maxfields - CEO, It's All About Aging

Although it might not sound very festive, when you’re home for the holidays, between finding a perfect tree, buying last minute gifts and drinking too much eggnog, it’s a good time to take a look around. How do things look? How’s the house, your parents? What’s changed since the last time you were there?

The holidays have enough stress built in, so this is not the time for confrontation. Do keep a little notebook, and write down what you see that doesn’t look right to you. Things to look for include irritability, confusion, short term memory loss, unopened mail, unusual spending and or hoarding, changes in the home, and changes in appetite. Julie Hall in her book The Boomer Burden has a much more comprehensive list, along with suggestions on what steps to take.

After the holidays, talk to siblings or family friends, and compare notes. See if what’s happening is just part of the stress of the holidays or an ongoing issue that needs addressing. If you’re like me and have both parents, try to time it right so you can get one alone on the phone, and check in. Other times, people like, my cousin, who lives nearby, are good go-to people. What you don’t want to do is ignore the situation and hope it will go away. Even thought it may be painful, don’t you think planning ahead of time is always better than crisis intervention?

 It’s All About Aging is a web site to give Baby Boomers the information and tools to plan for aging parents.  The site will allow them to tap into a knowledge base, discover resources, share experiences, and store important documents in a virtual safe deposit box.  Moreover, users will learn how to better cope with the stresses and strains of preparing for the needs of elderly parents and relatives. 

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